Why have a BRIS?
Keep in mind that "ritual" is the core word of "spirituality". There can be little dissent on the importance and influence of the TORAH to the world as we know it. Even a broad spectrum of interpretations has not swayed the course of this powerful document from being the core of Judaic belief and the basis of its spirituality. The commandment for the BRIS is unequivical, repeated and restated in that document. It is intrinsic to our belief system. IT HAS ALSO BEEN SUCCESSFULLY TIME TESTED!

We all want to see our children navigate the minefields of life with happiness and health. A large component of the triumph of that struggle is due to personal connections and spiritual bondings. Anguish frequently comes from our inability to attach to those goals. Judaism demands the circumcision of all healthy male babies for full inclusion into its system. It has never been a health consideration, but a spiritual one. Failure to comply carries a potentially heavy spiritual penalty. In my practice I have had to deal with many young men who's parents skipped the "inconvenience" of a BRIS or even chose not to have them circumcised. The remedy is always unpleasant, sometimes causing a great rift in familial relationships. The other side of all that is the parental joy in sharing their good feelings with chosen family and friends at the celebration of the new son's entry into the personal and extended family at his BRIS. If you are ambivalent, err on the side of commission, not omission. When the event is carefully and sensitively handled, everybody wins.

By whom?
Circumsision has never been seen by Judaism as a medical proceedure. Most doctors recieve little or no training in circumcision and prefer not to do them unless there is a fair monetary benefit, which doesn't happen in hospitals today. Doctors, for the most part, gladly defer their Jewish patients (and frequently their non-Jewish ones) to a MOHEL. It is important that parents choose a MOHEL who is proficient, experienced, and who is recognized by the religious community to function in that capacity. The professional MOHEL has been a significant presence in the Jewish community for thousands of years. There are some sincere and observant doctors who can fulfill this need, particularly in isolated areas where a professional MOHEL is not readily available. There is, sadly, a proliferation of non- or marginally observant doctors who are abusing the trust of that community by purporting to be religious functionaries when they are actually just trying to suppliment income. This disdainful attitude has caused grief to families who trusted such practitioners only to find later that their ministrations were not acceptable in certain instances. This is particularly so in situations of conversions, mixed marriages and Israeli citizenship. Check with your local Boards of Rabbis to determine who is legitimate. I pass on, without judgement, the caution that a certification by a Reform group will most likely not be recognized by Conservative Rabbis and most assuredly not by Orthodox ones.

Does it have to hurt?
No parent wants to see harm or pain come to their child. Much has been done to try to alleviate even the trauma of birth. Amazingly, few hospital circumcisions are performed with the benefit of anesthetics. This has resulted in a highly vocal and visible, but small cadre of anti- circumcision activists. Regretably, some Jewish parents fall into this bog and many of them later have the deep regrets I mentioned earlier. Several years ago, a forum was convened at the Yeshiva University in New York consisting of the highest religious and medical authorities conversant in the subject of the BRIS. The topic was the issue of anesthetics. I was among several professional MOHELIM who were invited to give our insights. I was delighted when they concluded that if safe anesthetics were available, it was immoral not to use them. In effect, they stated that circumcision was fundamental but didn't have to be painful. My father and I had already made that decision almost thirty years earlier. That's when we started using topical anesthetics and working on the technology and proficiency to perform a safe, comfortable circumcision in about 20 seconds.

The other pain!
There is one remaining area of discomfort; fees. I've decided that I will no longer quote them. Throughout the United States, the fees for a BRIS charged by a MOHEL in his (or her) local community runs between $300 to $600. Please never make your choice based on a dollar number. In this, as in almost any other profession, those of lesser experience will entice you to to allow them to gain more experience, on your baby, through a lower fee. Also, If you choose a MOHEL in whom you have confidence but who must travel outside of "home base", there would be an expectation of consideration for travel time and expenses. Personally, I have never asked a calling party if they could afford to pay for my services before accepting their commission. I have actually brought food, wine and aftercare supplies when I knew that a family could not afford a BRIS otherwise.